Wrecked...

This was a bad evening for me...completely wrecked. This image was in between the tears, but before I broke down completely. I had no one to lean on. Again, reminding me how in dire times, you have only yourself to get you through. Internally...I was having such turmoil. I had such a need to relinquish my strength, if even for a little while. To be embraced long and hard. To be told it was okay, that I was having a moment. To be weak and fragile, which I can be at times. For someone, for anyone to say...you got me Liz, I'm here for you. I mean...I couldn't even talk. My body just fell apart...as if, it needed to release. Possibly tension, feelings, some stress and lots of energy...emotional energy. It had to go somewhere. It had to be cleansed from my system. Now, I'm just numb and just disappointed, in people no less. Will I ever feel that wholehearted wholesome trust in another? Will they ever respond as they promise to do? Will they ever respond without being asked? Will they just be? As they should? I hope...that by the time I have another intense moment like that in my life. I will have someone special actually pull through,  carry the weight from my shoulders and give me a moment of reprieve so that I may continue forward with vigor and vitality. Pushing this ship past the wreckage and into the beautiful blue sea of life.